Goomba Beanie

Not all of us can be a Super Mario Brother, but thankfully you don’t have to be. No longer do we need need to go on a dangerous wild Goomba hunt to be able to proudly wear the skin of a Goomba you have slain with your own two hands. Or feet, as that seems to be the traditional method of Goomba hunting. Now you can own your very own Wild Goomba skin thanks to Amazon without the need to submit yourself to the terrors of the Mushroom Kingdom (seriously, talking mushrooms would freak anyone out, I don’t care what you say).

The Goomba in its natural state is a docile and pleasant creature. But when it, or its young are threatened, it reacts as anything in the wild does, with self defense. Happily for the hunters of the not so elusive Goomba, its self defense consists of walking slowly to its left while facing forwards. This allows the hunter to sneak up on the Goomba quite easily.

The favored method of killing the wild Goomba is to jump upon its head with both feet and the full force of your body behind you. Unfortunately for trophy hunter, this usually damages the skull of the Goomba irreparably. As you can see in the above picture, a wild Goomba with its head intact is a marvelous trophy to behold