Keep your money hidden is the one place that even crack heads dare to tread. In your shit stained underwear! These skidmarked bloomers are the perfect way to keep your valuables protect, while simultaneously protecting you from any unwanted romantic attentions from every single person on the planet.
This “innovative” design was created with the intention of keeping your cash, and cards safe. You simply place your money in the 4″ x 10″ hidden compartment in the front of the poop stained panties, seal the velcro up tight, and pray that you won’t have to pull out your identification for any policemen.
You may be thinking that for $15 it would be much cheaper and easier to simply make your own pair at home. But these professionally designed poop protectors have one big advantage over home-made poopy equivalents, they aren’t scratch and sniff.